Today was “top up” day in my second cycle but, more importantly, it was a chance for me to find some solution for the horrible way I’ve been feeling this last week. Angela, the district nurse, had told me to make sure they knew the problems as there were meds that could help and Ann had told me to lay it on with a trowel to make sure I came home with something positive.
My treatment chair was booked for 9.30 which meant I really needed to be there for 8.30 to allow time for my blood results to come through. On the basis of how I felt yesterday I didn’t think I could get there so early but as things turned out I felt reasonably alert and got up about 6.30 which gave me time without having to rush.
By arriving that early I avoided queuing for my blood test as they called my number almost before my backside hit the chair & I was soon on my way up to ward 3, the day treatment unit. There are no beds, just comfortable chairs and it’s a pleasant airy space to sit, wait and be treated.
A nurse came along and started the routine checks of BP, temperature, pulse etc and started asking me about how I felt and I let her have it pretty strongly. She called a colleague & I went through it all again. It was decided that I had better see a doctor before treatment and one of the nurses took me back downstairs where, after a few minutes, I saw Dr. K again. I explained all my various symptoms to her and told her that for somebody who can’t see loss of balance, orientation, sense of direction, attention span and concentration levels is not just a nuisance but a real danger which has made me pretty nearly housebound. I told her that I am having trouble even finding my way round my own home so bad is it at times and she took off to consult a colleague.
Damn it! I even broke down in tears again. I have so little control just now & I just couldn’t help it.
Anyway the outcome is that I have come home after today’s treatment with some new tablets to tackle my vertigo, queezy stomach and also my anxiety. It seems that the platinum based medication that is delivered in the all-night sessions is known to effect nerve endings and she thought that this could be what had happened to my vestibular system resulting in the symptoms I’m suffering.
Dr. K also said she will recommend to the consultant, Dr. W, that it might be better to vary my treatment regime and avoid the platinum. It’s not her decision, of course, but if at all possible I would prefer to avoid another period of feeling like this in my third cycle provided, of course, it doesn’t threaten the outcome of the treatment.
So I came home and glad to be back where I feel safe and secure and where if I do have another emotional outburst there’s only Ann to witness it.
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